Home Forums Krav Maga Worldwide Forums General KM Related Topics This is a tough introduction.

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  • #34272
    defiance
    Member

    Hi.

    I have been considering trying KM but I have so many reservations. I haven’t worked out in a very long time. I am probably considered morbidly obese but I don’t necessarily feel that way. I smoke. I am definitely out of shape.

    While these are all extremely concerning in their own right, I have other concerns that are weighing me down.

    I am a survivor, if you know what that means. Recently, one of my abusers has been coming around. I don’t feel safe because I am not safe. He’s threatened me. I cannot change the exposure to him that I have so please don’t suggest the police or something of the like. I simply need to learn how to protect myself.

    But I am scared to try this knowing it will trigger me. I’m in a good head space mostly about what he did to me. But it will trigger me and I almost need it to. When this person, who is larger, stronger, and significantly more fit than I, comes at me, I freeze. I go numb and my brain stops. I can’t afford that anymore. I need to fix it.

    My hope is to train in private but would any trainer be willing to take all that on? I feel overwhelming for anyone, let alone a stranger. Can I even do this? Or is this a bad idea? Private messages would be fine if you don’t feel comfortable posting her but thank you to anyone with help or advice.

    #89499
    jjbklb
    Member

    Re: This is a tough introduction.

    Walks;& quickly pick up the pace to get some ‘wind’ in your sails before Krav.
    In the interim,pick up a can of Mace to carry.

    #89500
    tzrider
    Member

    Re: This is a tough introduction.

    quote Defiance:

    I am a survivor, if you know what that means. Recently, one of my abusers has been coming around. I don’t feel safe because I am not safe. He’s threatened me. I cannot change the exposure to him that I have so please don’t suggest the police or something of the like. I simply need to learn how to protect myself.

    But I am scared to try this knowing it will trigger me. I’m in a good head space mostly about what he did to me. But it will trigger me and I almost need it to. When this person, who is larger, stronger, and significantly more fit than I, comes at me, I freeze. I go numb and my brain stops. I can’t afford that anymore. I need to fix it.

    It sounds like you have good reason to learn to defend yourself. There may be things about the process that are uncomfortable at first, but you know that if you are to improve your situation you’ll have to confront your fears.

    The best way I know of to do that with anything you’re afraid of is through progressive desensitization. As you research schools, get in touch with them; explain your situation and concerns. See if they have an approach that addresses those concerns and try to be open to the possibility that they will go about it in a different way than you have envisioned. You might ask if they have trained other abuse victims in the past. If they have, they have some reality on the subject.

    There are a couple of Krav Maga Worldwide affiliates listed for Pittsburg: https://kravmaga.com/pennsylvania/ If you haven’t already found them, it’s a place to start.

    I wouldn’t wait to begin training until you’re “more fit.” In my experience, people who say that never get around to training in Krav. Better to come to class and do what you can. Over time your fitness level will improve, you’ll gain the skills you seek and you’ll probably feel pretty good.

    #89501

    Re: This is a tough introduction.

    quote tzrider:

    I wouldn’t wait to begin training until you’re “more fit.” In my experience, people who say that never get around to training in Krav. Better to come to class and do what you can. Over time your fitness level will improve, you’ll gain the skills you seek and you’ll probably feel pretty good.

    This dude is preachin the troof.

    Triggers aside, just go and get fit while learning to protect yourself.

    Triggers up front: speak to your therapist AND psychiatrist to make sure you’re mentally fit and ready to begin training-in private or a group setting. Based on my experience with triggers and traumatic events, exposure to the trigger is what ultimately broke me of my traumatic experience(s) and I don’t really even think about them anymore; they’ve morphed into a learning experience and no longer generate fear or a sense of loss of control over me.

    Keep in mind that until you can control your fear and reactions to triggers, you won’t be able to defend yourself as effectively, if at all.

    You can take control.

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