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Since I started KM 10 months ago I think I’ve ended up visiting the outpatient clinic about every other month with some new injury. (It’s all part of the fun! 😈 ) Luckily everything has turned out to be a bad sprain, strain, etc. and nothing has been broken. However, the doctors always ask how I was injured. I, of course, tell them exactly what happened and then they always give me really funny looks.
The average conversation goes something like this:
Doc: So, what happened to your thumb?
Me: A guy wacked me really hard with a big plastic knife.
Doc: (Shocked) Why on earth would someone do that to you?
Me: Oh, it’s ok. I was trying to stab him w/ my big plastic knife and he blocked me. Quite successfully too.
Doc: (Weird look) And why were you doing this?
Me: To learn self defense. Duh! (Ok, I didn’t really say ‘duh’)
Doc: (Backing out of the room) Uh, ok then, um let me just go look at your Xrays.So, just out of curiosity, what do you all tell your doctors and how do they react? Should I just keep it simple and say \”playing sports\” and leave it at that?
I avoid the whole conversation by just staying home and putting ice on the bruise myself… 8)
If it’s too big an injury to take care of yourself, I guess I’d rather be straight with the doctor on how I got it. He may need the info for better treatment. Of course, you could explain that you take self-defense lessons first, before getting into the more intricate details, that way he’d be better prepared for what comes next.
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GiantkillerJust tell him, \”Nevermind me! You should see what the other guy looks like!\” Then yell at the top of your lungs \”MORPHINE NOW!!!\”. 😆
I got the cauliflour ear, so I went to get it drained the doc asked how i did it. Then told me I should get some head gear. I told him head gear was more expensive than the co-pay so I would rather have him fix it. After the THIRD visit he became more expensive.
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quote \”kbb\:I got the cauliflour ear, so I went to get it drained the doc asked how i did it. Then told me I should get some head gear. I told him head gear was more expensive than the co-pay so I would rather have him fix it. After the THIRD visit he became more expensive.Nice ROFL
Re: How do you explain your injuries to your Doctor?
I got a rubber training knife in the eye the other night.
Thats not an easy one to explain to the uninitiated.
Re: How do you explain your injuries to your Doctor?
Easy. I just look down and whisper, “Um, I’m a battered husband…”
Works every time!
Re: How do you explain your injuries to your Doctor?
quote stevetuna:Easy. I just look down and whisper, “Um, I’m a battered husband…”Works every time!
That needs to be added to CJ’s Dad signature.
Re: How do you explain your injuries to your Doctor?
quote stevetuna:Easy. I just look down and whisper, “Um, I’m a battered husband…”Works every time!
Damn you beat me too it Steve!! I was going to say, “My wife beats me, and I kinda like it.”
Re: How do you explain your injuries to your Doctor?
I took my friend to the ER with a groin pull from class, and the nurses there told her about battered spouses counseling after seeing all her arm bruises from situational assaults seminar! She said, “Oh no, only my friends hit me, ’cause I ask them too.”:):
Re: How do you explain your injuries to your Doctor?
I just avoid the doctor and accumulate minor pains. I don’t recommend it.
Why does Giantkiller have a restricted user tag?
Re: How do you explain your injuries to your Doctor?
As a former ER night-shifter, I say don’t worry about the explanation too much. I guarantee you the the person down the hall is trying to explain the foreign object got stuck in their rectum. “I slipped in the shower” is quite popular. Your sprained thumb is low on the curiosity list.thumbsup
Re: How do you explain your injuries to your Doctor?
I get my medical treatment from the Navy docs. 99% of the time they don’t even want to know, and will sometimes go to great lengths to avoid finding out.
Re: How do you explain your injuries to your Doctor?
quote phlegmon27:As a former ER night-shifter, I say don’t worry about the explanation too much. I guarantee you the the person down the hall is trying to explain the foreign object got stuck in their rectum. “I slipped in the shower” is quite popular. Your sprained thumb is low on the curiosity list.thumbsupSoooooo very wrong…
(but funny. As the guy said to the doc in the ER after the doc had just discovered a dozen roses tucked in the man’s nether region: “Read the card, read the card!”)
Re: How do you explain your injuries to your Doctor?
You need to get one of those magic eightballs that you first ask a question then shake,turn upside down,then get your answer
What happened to your arm?
Well doc,I………(shake,shake ,shake….”Fell off a ladder”
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What are you back here again for?Your knee’s all swollen!
Well doc,I………(shake,shake ,shake…..”fell off a….” Wait a minute….
(shake ,shake ,shake………”I banged into a chair”
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