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Hello ppl.
What¥s your opinion about someone insulting you face to face, calling you all kind of things, but doesn¥t attack you phisically?
Do you react, or you just forget it, and turn away?Re: Reacting to Insult
Do you mean being harassed constantly? Are they taunting you cause you know KM and want you to react??
Re: Reacting to Insult
no no.
Pontual situations that we have trough our lives. As you know “first shot” is always an advantage, but i wonder if we should react to insult, after all words don¥t hurt (phisically), what do you people think?
Re: Reacting to Insult
I think this is kind of a no brainer. If I got in a fight every time I was insulted I’d be a professional fighter by now. The old “sticks and stones” motto comes to mind. This is just part of being a mature adult and being confident in who and what you are.
Now if your having trouble with someone that is constantly getting in your face trying to prevoke and incident, I’d still say walk away but at some point a resolution has to come about. This doesn’t mean pysicality but there’s a difference between a one off remark and someone that is trying to bully you.
Re: Reacting to Insult
“The old “sticks and stones” motto comes to mind” what is that motto?
You know, sometimes it is difficult to “swallow” some insults, but I think that the best thing to do, is just smile and go. Because, for me and for my Krav-Maga, words don¥t press the Go button. I don¥t know if i am right, some people, with just a “**** you”, start a fight. I don¥t know what is the best atitude, that¥s why I sarted this Thread.
Re: Reacting to Insult
The “sticks and stones” expression is “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” Essentially, words are just that. Until a confrontation IS physical (or is really, REALLY inevitably turning physical…and even then it’s questionable as a civilian) being the first to use physical force in an encounter puts YOU as the responsible party for having a pissing match turn into a fight.
Not about insults, but I had an encounter a few months ago, someone approached my wife and I, was getting between us and where we wanted to go (our car), asked for a jump for his car, which he then admitted he didn’t have, then asked for money for the bus (why did he want us to follow him to where his ‘car’ was?), as we changed direction to go over to the car, he stepped in front of us again…it was getting close to the time where I was going to have to escalate, I had already used my off hand to move my wife behind me, and had set into a “ready” stance, and I believe he saw my demeanor change from trying to de-escalate to being ready to end the encounter by whatever means neccesary, and he backed off.
Had I put my hands on him, though I feared I was about to be attacked, I would have had LOTS of explaining to do.
Same is true with insults. Sure, he’s the one that “started it,” and made the encounter hostile…but if you through that punch…you are the aggressor. Be aware of this. Do waht you can to avoid this person, and don’t allow the insults to cost YOU anything.Re: Reacting to Insult
Yes, I totally agree with you.
But sometimes, is very dificult for me, to accept that.Because I am the kind of person, who thinks a lot about things.And After an altercation or some hard discussion, I waste a lot of my time thinking about the problem.I don¥t know if it is a common reaction for everybody, but sometimes i get tired of this way off dealing with problems, and I¥m afraid, that with the time my GO switch button, turns ON more easily.I hope you understand what i am trying to say.
I don¥t know if it is EGO or my Pride, but i¥ve this stupid felling, of if i turn my back to the problem it¥s cowardy, fear…
P.S : I¥m not a Teenager 🙂
Re: Reacting to Insult
I also think it’s important to differentiate between insults and threats. Insults, like others have said, hold no real potential for physical harm. Threats, on the other hand, indicate at least a desire, at most a clear intention to cause physical harm. Provided the person doing the threatening also has some measure of actual capability to carry out the threat, I think it should be treated much differently.
Re: Reacting to Insult
quote oasktf:So with a serious threat, will you give the first shot?serious threats, yes and attack first
insults, no, its VERY hard to do, but just walk awayRe: Reacting to Insult
KravMDjeff said it well and Vex, watch body language and react on threats not just insults, i think also maintaining distance while aggression is displayed is a good idea if possible in that situation.
Re: Reacting to Insult
A fantastic book to read is Nasty People by Jay Carter. (http://www.amazon.com/Nasty-People-Without-Becoming-Bestselling/dp/0809244063)
This book focuses on dealing with these types of people, who he referres to as “invalidators”. Like others have already pointed out, this is vastly different from a threat, but I think Krav alone gives you a great mentality to deal with threats and physical confrontations.The essence of the book explains how these types of people invalidate others because of a low self-esteem and low self-worth. It helps you identify how they will invalidate you, and how you can deal with it. I actually just read this book a few weeks ago, and I was amazed by how applicable it was. Most of the things that the author describes you will recognize and see how others so frequently use this demoralizing tactic. I would recommend this book to everyone!
Re: Reacting to Insult
I believe this clip shows what kind of restraint one can practice:
http://www.dumpert.nl/mediabase/649221/1075f023/britse_burenruzie.htmlBut there is a point when enough is enough…
Regards from Munich,
John
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