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Re: "Training is great and all, but useless in a real life situation"
I like what you said about being seen as “nice guy who would help you out no matter what.” That’s pretty cool. Good for you.
I agree with Chocolate Soldier too. High School sucks for exactly the reasons you’ve cited. As soon as you get out and (hopefully) go on to college, your whole world is going to open up like you never would’ve believed possible. You will look back on people from high school and you’ll have a much clearer perspective on who the real losers were.
Good luck, sir!
Re: "Training is great and all, but useless in a real life situation"
My sister-in-law would often tell her son, “Beware of the kids who peak too soon.” The bottom line – life is a marathon, not a sprint. Some of your hot-shot peers have gone as high on the life-o-meter as they’re ever going to get (damn, this is starting to sound like a review of ‘Back to the Future’ – but I digress…).
Here’s some things that I wish someone had told me when I was 17 (um, maybe they DID tell me, but it was hard to hear with my head jammed so far up my butt…):
1.) Develop high standards for yourself. Don’t expect others to accept them, because many of them won’t. Examples would be living by the golden rule, finding a way to help someone else who can do nothing for you, standing up for what you believe in, etc.
2.) Have faith. Be grateful for the wonderful gifts you have. I know nothing more about you other than what you’ve posted, but it’s enough to tell me that you’re thoughtful, athletic, motivated, intelligent and healthy. That puts you ahead of much of the field, trust me. So, be grateful for these gifts and strive to use them for good. Think about where those gifts came from and give thanks. Every day. Gratitude is everything.
3.) Laugh at yourself. We all make mistakes, we all feel like the fool from time to time. So if you step in it, laugh it off, learn from it and move on. The ten year rule is a good one – that is, think about a situation, and project yourself forward ten years. If the decision you make won’t matter then, then it isn’t that big a deal now. So lighten up, Francis!
4.) Relationships come and go. You’ll have your heart broken from time to time. That’s life. You’re real young and you’re going to need to experience some life before you’re ready to make any form of lifetime commitment. When it’s right, you’ll know. But the less you try, the easier it gets. (hey, I’ve been married twice – I can speak expertly on the topic!)
5.) Think about the positive effects of drugs and alcohol vs. the negative effects. I know one thing for sure – in my case, the negative vastly outweighed the positive. I lost some great years because I didn’t get this point. What a squander… Avoid this trap!
6.) Don’t be afraid to fail. Remember the quote I previously posted from Mr. Hoover. You can’t get better if you don’t push yourself. Give yourself a chance – get in the ring and give it your all!
7.) Karma is real. Every bad thing I’ve done has come back at me ten times harder. Conversely, every good thing I’ve done has, too. Damn, I’m so mad they cancelled “My Name Is Earl”!
8.) Life is short. As Warren Zevon once said, “Enjoy every sandwich”. My job often puts me in contact with people who aren’t coming down for breakfast any more. It sure gives you a different perspective on what is and isn’t important. People are important. Things aren’t.
9.) Continue learning. Always. Focusing on the same subject long enough can make you an expert, and, perhaps, boring. Don’t focus enough on any one thing and you can end up being a cop at age 40 (not necessarily a bad thing, btw!). Who knows? Read, listen, explore. It will at least make you interesting. And that, my friend, leads to #10!
10.) Be interesting. Girls like interesting. Friends like interesting. Employers sometimes appreciate interesting. If all you have 20 years out of high school is the memory of the Thanksgiving Day football game you won, guess what – you’re boring as crap. That doesn’t sound like your path at all. Hell, you’re ready to go to Israel to study Krav Maga? Dude, that’s some interesting stuff! You’re on the right track – so keep moving!
That’s enough of my crap for one night. There are few older than me posting here, but many wiser. I’m sure that they’ll add to this list. Best wishes!
Re: "Training is great and all, but useless in a real life situation"
BTW, Mike’s (unstpabl1) post above said everything mine did, only better. Per usual!
Re: "Training is great and all, but useless in a real life situation"
quote jdawgmcb:It just bugs me to **** how everyone immediately thinks they can kick my ass because of how i used to be.Now i weigh 146 lbs, benchin 250+, squatting 350+, DL 350+ ( i know this stuff doesnt matter but i thought i would throw it out there)
Before krav i did train about 2 years of tae-kwon-do as well. (but took off quite a few years in between taking the two classes)
I’m almost out of high school – and i guess im just frustrated that girls ignore me as some sort of loser (havent even kissed a girl since 8th grade and im a senior now), guys think they are better than me and that i can’t defend myself anymore.
I guess it’s normal for this stuff to get to your head, Sun Tzu’s quote really inspired me, however.
Out of curiosity – after 2 straight years of krav maga training (with a trip to Israel to see how they train there…yes im planning that in about 5-6 months) do you think that would give me the confidence i need to oblieterate any life threat.
I have no interest “friend scrapping” with my friends or any other people (as this is relatively common in high school)… i don’t feel comfortable using my defense for headlock takedowns (groin punch and use your hands above their forehead to throw them down), hammers to the neck, kicks to the groin, etc…but if it was a real life situation i feel that my reflexes would take place.
I think im getting addicted to my krav classes…they are soooo much fun and informative 🙂
It depends the person and it depends who you are defending yourself against. I have many, many years of Muai Thai and jiu jitsu experience, so 2 years of Krav Maga isn’t going to stop that. It all depends on muscle memory and responding to your opponent.
Re: "Training is great and all, but useless in a real life situation"
quote unstpabl1:What a great discussion…not because your going thru 17 y/o angst….we all went thru it by the way…sucks huh? but because it asks questions about ourselves we ask “Forever”. There eternal…Who am I? what am I capable of? What do I need to do to be more capable/ etc etc. Am I the Ahole everyone tells me I am or is it them? ( In my case its always “them”)rofl2What the heck is wrong with me?You’ve gotten some great feedback, so if your paying attention you got the answers. Only thing I can add is some observations from the sidelines. Maybe they’ll have some value
4 months of training is not very much, like everything else it depends on the person. Coordination, strength, endurance, ability to commit violence all play apart. I always figure every student has one foot out the door. 4 months is a place where students question the validity of their training. many get that 1st or 2nd belt and never come back….very common to look for excuses not to follow thru….We all frikken contribute to our own self sabotage. By the way, your training is valid and proven.
We have to ask ourselves, perferably on paper, as it clarifies our thoughts, “Why” we’re doing anything. Once we define it, its concrete or real to us. If you come up with an answer like I’m going to be the baddest MoFO in the junglebow1 Well your off track, because thats not doable. Think about MMA. The UFC, every star has gotten his butt kicked or will. Life is even more unpredictable as there are people who don’t share your values about friendship and fair play.
What it sounds like to me is your someone who took a look at his life and didn’t like what he saw…and unlike 95% of the world, decided to do something about it to improve himself…Working out, taking care of himself takes effort and determination. Its not the easy path. Its hard to show up for class and w/o’s regularly. Hell, all that training is great an all, but useless in real life, is a boy’s way of saying he ain’t got the personal fortitude to put in the work to improve himself.
let me ask you something, have you improved physically in the last 4 months, is class easier, punches stronger, How much could you bench on your 1st day? you may not notice it, but your improving everyday. Your friend is deteriorating daily. Because we’re either working to improve or we deteriorate
In the end, no martial art will make us 6’10” and bulletproof, what it does is make you Tougher. I think of it as toughness training and I define that with James Loehr definetion of toughness: flexibility, responsiveness,strength, and resiliency. These qualities are not just physical, there also emotional and mental. Krav training addresses them and improves them all. your buddies comment betrays his weakness in those areas as Mentally tough people understand the value of effort and that life is a do-it-yourself project. Of course the lazy ones are always willing to tell you what you can’t do or whats a waste of time. The thing they aren’t saying is how much they wish they could get themselves to act, but of course, working to improve yourself is great and all, but its useless in a real life situation.:dunno:
It’s not what people think of us that puts us in our place, its what “WE” think of ourselves that defines ourselves. We are self determined, but only to the degree that we think and make our own decisions.
You should be proud of your efforts of self improvements. You may not have impressed your buddy, but you impressed me. And I’m a hell of a lot harder to impress at 50 than I was at 17.
keep training. your in the right system
This is the best quote I have ever seen explaining this topic and should be posted on every forum for every art/system.
Re: "Training is great and all, but useless in a real life situation"
[quote=stevetuna;46203]
7.) Karma is real. Every bad thing I’ve done has come back at me ten times harder. Conversely, every good thing I’ve done has, too. Damn, I’m so mad they cancelled “My Name Is Earl”!
quote]
THEY CANCELED EARL!!!!!!!:OhMy: that was my fav show…didnt get to watch it on tv but watched it on the web (krav is on thursday nite)
as for the original post, sounds like high school testostrone issues, as you mature you’ll see that high school was a big p!ssing match, (i.e. football is better that wrestling,cheerleader is better than flag girl,glee club is better than chess club and so on)
is 4 months of krav worth a friend? you might stop krav, or move on the a tma, or bjj, but a true friend will be true friend forever, end the conversation with something like this “we’ll never know, you’re my friend and i hope we’ll never have to find out”
good luck
russellRe: "Training is great and all, but useless in a real life situation"
such a pleasure to have unstpabl1 back with us in the forums isn’t it.
Re: "Training is great and all, but useless in a real life situation"
If all else fails take him (the bully friend of yours) to class with you on sparring day and introduce him to some of your training partners. I am sure they will be happy to show him some of there useless training:combat:. As for your low self-esteem hang in there everything will be ok.
Re: "Training is great and all, but useless in a real life situation"
quote CJs Dad:such a pleasure to have unstpabl1 back with us in the forums isnít it.I’d say!
Re: "Training is great and all, but useless in a real life situation"
One of the great surprises of this forum… to come here and read such profound words of wisdom. As those of us who are “up there” in years I think we can look back to when we were teenagers and wish we had Stevetuna’s words. And to those of you now in situations like jdawgmcb, great food for thought. Nice job Steve.
Re: "Training is great and all, but useless in a real life situation"
quote jdawgmcb:Now i weigh 146 lbs, benchin 250+, squatting 350+, DL 350+ ( i know this stuff doesnt matter but i thought i would throw it out there)I have no interest “friend scrapping” with my friends or any other people (as this is relatively common in high school)… i don’t feel comfortable using my defense for headlock takedowns (groin punch and use your hands above their forehead to throw them down), hammers to the neck, kicks to the groin, etc…but if it was a real life situation i feel that my reflexes would take place.
🙂jdawgmcb,
Couple of things to add to the great advice here. First a lot of people who aren’t strong want to project the idea that strength doesn’t matter. It does. As my friend Rippetoe states “Strong people are more useful and generally harder to kill”. In a self defense situation, as in life, being stronger than the other guy is good. That being said I make my living making kids strong, very strong. I want to see your 350 pound squat. Video it. Post it to Youtube. It’s not hard, and if you have a camera phone can be done in a few seconds. Post the link here.Old person’s perspective: Your “friend” isn’t. Friends want the best for you. They celebrate and support your efforts to improve. You deserve better than this.
Regarding CJ’s comment:
Yes that day comes without you noticing, but other people do.Re: "Training is great and all, but useless in a real life situation"
Just so we’re clear – this guy is NOT a bully to me, he is just one of those people who thinks he is better than everyone else (apparently he could kick any of my instructors asses…one of my instructors is only 5’2″……but he has trained MA straight since he was 4…he’s 23 now)
He can’t really attend a krav class for a while because of his schedule, but i would love to get him in there 🙂
Re: "Training is great and all, but useless in a real life situation"
Well, this isn’t a suggestion of MA, Krav or self defense but if you want to humble him, don’t wait till his schedule works, just have him do a nice fun crossfit work out!! I’m sure Garddawg could recommend a nice first time crossfit that will let him know the true joy of it…
Re: "Training is great and all, but useless in a real life situation"
quote jdawgmcb:Just so we’re clear – this guy is NOT a bully to me, he is just one of those people who thinks he is better than everyone else (apparently he could kick any of my instructors asses…one of my instructors is only 5’2″……but he has trained MA straight since he was 4…he’s 23 now)He can’t really attend a krav class for a while because of his schedule, but i would love to get him in there 🙂
jdawgmcb – Just wanted to point out that some guys like Steve Tuna & unstopabl took the time out their day to come up with some very helpful advice, yet still the theme here I notice is who might be able to kick or not kick whoever’s a$$ and the continued comparison with this friend of yours.
Maybe your friend is the heir to the throne of Chuck Norris, maybe not – perhaps he can kick many person’s a$$es, but what would that really prove?
A tip: the whole discussion and obsession with who can possibly kick whoever’s a$$ and maybe even trying to prove it, is very much a young guy thing and rates very high on the yawn scale for girls. The guys who expend their time and energy on this subject should know that in the meantime, while they are obsessing and flexing, other guys from the area who have a different tactic and mindset are busy making flanking moves on the available girls. Lol.
Just train hard, be the best you can be, be yourself, be honest & let the chips fall where they may – this goes a long way in a whole lot of situations…
For the rest – this thread is an example of one of the things I like about KM which is that its usually a nice group of people who look out for each other. I like how the older guys rallied with some advice for a younger fellow to help him on his journey. Thumbs up people!
Re: "Training is great and all, but useless in a real life situation"
quote garddawg:Regarding CJ’s comment:
Yes that day comes without you noticing, but other people do.Its like the first time Amir walked into the room. Iíd never seen him nor even heard of the guy. But he walked in dropped his bag and my first thought was ìoh **** whoís thatî not because of his size but because of that quiet confidence he exudes which tells you thatís a force to be reckoned with.
It turned out heís one of the most quiet humble guys youíll meet; heís also one of the most deadly.
Someday youíll come across a situation where you will be tested, and hopefully you will just smile and think to yourself, I could if I wanted to but its just not worth the repercussions.
And thatís when youíll know.
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